People usually do not put much thought into preparing for marriage. Instead, they spend months and months planning a wedding and just expecting the marriage to be perfect and work itself out. I do not understand this thought process. One thing I have learned in life is that any relationship that is not worked on, does not work out.
Because of this poor understanding of preparing for marriage, we discussed the proper steps in class. They are as follows:
Dating
- Go on a variety of dates with a variety of people
- Go on many dates with one person
- This is a trial marriage, so many different experiences are needed
- Learning to rely on each other/becoming one
- Work together to make important decisions (not just wedding decisions, but marriage decisions such as finances, children, discipline, etc.)
- Honeymoon: attentive to one another/building an "us"
I love how you point out that it is vital to plan beyond your wedding day. Relationships, especially if you want it to last for eternity, take a significant amount of work.
ReplyDeleteI agree that dating, courtship, engagement, and marriage are steps and it is important they are intended. Yet, I know discussing my own courtship and marriage and those of many of my friends, it almost felt like a slide in that it came naturally. While it was necessary to define each step with a discussion, these conversations came easily. My husband and I went on a few dates and naturally started courting. After later discussion, we discovered we had both had begun praying about engagement and marriage without discussing it with each other first because it felt natural. So while they are steps, if things are right, these steps should come as natural, at least in my opinion.